The wild grows like flowers

Amidst the landscape of earthen Spirits

Each lay claim to your heart and soul

Such emptiness abounds

In a sanctuary blessed by the gods

Confounded by humanity

Such bliss meets the unknown

And waivers in the presence of

Unconditional love

Descend into yourself

Pulsating heartbeats

The sanctuary will reveal itself

One light at a time

One god at a time

One day you will no longer

Fear the self you have been

Running from.

Change is coming.

Emerging from chaos, the emptiness had its purpose.

Defined by the experiences we have all struggled through

The emptiness became a companion as the world returned to its original wound of separation.

It needed us as much as we needed it.

We needed it in the light, only we bathed with it in the darkness.

Our fury contained within boundaries we had not yet uncovered.

Our faith in the light wavering from desperation.

How are we to trust this new horizon?

Emerge slowly.

So that you may taste the light in all its innocence and bless the chaos.

Not as you would have it, but as that wound of separation.

That wound which will bring many of you back to yourself.

Back to this world, back to each other.

The warmth of the sun is kissing your lips today.

The birds will sing glorious melodies in your name.

Emerge during this change that is upon us.

For in your emptiness

all will be made holy and still.

Or that doubt and insecurity were emotional prisons that kept you from your authentic self?

Who was it that guided you in thinking that if things went awry you were on the wrong path?

And when did your humanity become something to be ashamed of in the course of your awakening?

Live your life without having to constantly question or analyze every thought or emotion you perceive is counterintuitive to your spiritual growth. There is such vulnerability and fragility in our humanness  There is such authenticity at the threshold of our weaknesses that we sometimes cannot see them as strengths. There is great hope within those wounds. There is great love within that emptiness. There is as much dignity in carrying the darkness as there is in carrying the light.

How much guilt are you willing to part with amidst this emotional chaos?

Are you willing to let God see you in the mire as much as you allow Her to see you in the light?

The choice is yours.

Your humanity doesn’t have to be as difficult as you make it.

It is not something we can define

until we are standing knee deep in the mire

With a fire that so encapsulates us

One that burns through the softness and acceptance

of a surrender we had become disciplined to befriend.

It is something that can consume us

In its righteousness

When not respected for what its lessons can bring.

It can alter your world if you allow it or

show you compassion as you endure it.

The way you carry it becomes your choice.

Hollow in form when in the darkness

yet filled with such renewal of creation

When held in the light.

Such a delicate balance

weaved between enemy and friend.

Your emotion.

Part of your nature.

Respect its boundaries

And let that fire burn so it rebirths

Yet not destroys the very life you live.

It won’t make the loneliness go away.

It won’t make your unworthiness disappear.

It won’t make the powerlessness change.

It will just remind you of all those wounds you have been trying to run away from.

Recognize your shame gently and humbly

So that it can bear witness to the light

That will offer it the healing

It so truly deserves.

There is a hastening of body, mind and spirit unfolding.

In my prayers, I keep asking God to afford us all the grit we need to stay present and empty.

Throughout time astrological and spiritual shifts have transpired as they are now- there is nothing different about that.

What is different is that we have more to lose, because as a collective identity, we have acquired more.

More in the physical, emotional and spiritual realms. Our desires and attachments to material things, emotions and thoughts have compounded themselves tenfold, thus increasing the myriad power struggles we have created to keep those identities we perceive make us safe. Our desire for a “spiritual identity” which many equate to having spiritual gifts or prowess has grown, making many of us more lost than ever.

When do we allow ourselves to befriend the emptiness?

When do we become the portal we have been searching for?

When has fear become such a negative thing instead of a stop along the way to carrying the unknown?

I’ve witnessed more anxiety and depression than I ever have in my almost twenty eight years of practice.

Alienation and isolation as opposed to connection is the direction we have unfortunately been headed in.

All the tools in the world will not prevent us from grieving in those spaces, from experiencing the loss of identity over and over again in these challenging times. Those tools won’t prevent you from facing your anger, your pain or confusion. Those tools instead will give you the resolve to own them and allow them to forge a new identity with each challenge you face. It will offer you the opportunity for those connections you once used to crave so deeply and intensely.

There will always be endings and beginnings. There will always be waves of good and evil throughout humanity. What can shift is how we choose to engage with each power struggle. And within that process, we will acquire a new understanding of emptiness and the unknown. That portal is within. I invite you to make its acquaintance.

That sacred vessel

Where humanity’s tears and wounds

Dance ecstatically amidst

The miracles of your ancestors.

The darkness and the light

are both so alive and raw

With generations

Of a collective identity

Still searching for a home.

That wilderness is your home.

A chaos so free and divine

So wild with God

That even play becomes a form

Of surrender.

You hope others bear witness to

Waiting centuries for any morsel of acknowledgement 

Let it rest gently 

In your mind

So that it might find peace

Until you rise

Within yourself

So much so

And realize that no other version

Of yourself

Really ever existed

Except the one

You have intimately loved

Throughout time.

One of my clients wasn’t feeling all that well. He has underlying chronic medical issues and was “switching” to such an extent that his medical condition was worsening. I spent the first twenty minutes listening and then I asked him to open an encapsulated herb and put some of it up both nostrils. Yes, you heard me right. Intranasal and transdermal methods of delivering herbs, oils, nutrients are a practice I have always utilized with my clients who are open to it and sensitive enough. In  Ayurveda, the nostrils are considered the pathway of prana. Within minutes, he began to settle and feel more like himself. The confusion subsided, his pulses began to normalize for him (something I feel over the phone), and by the end of the session his appetite returned. With another client I worked with, I asked her to break open a probiotic capsule and do the same thing. It also had a similar healing effect. This week they have been spraying dangerous pesticides in my area for West Nile. With the relentless heat, the pesticides remained in the air for days and I was having upper respiratory issues. I needed something to work with my brain pretty quickly so instead of taking liposomal glutathione internally, I put a few drops in my hand and massaged it into various neurovascular points on my head. I also put some probiotics in my own nostrils. Sometimes I will put fatty acids in my nostrils when they spray. 

There are various traditions of old that relied on transdermal methods of delivery for herbs or utilizing various orifices. Vaginal herbal steam baths were and are popular within certain cultures and used for many women’s reproductive health issues. Some of these methods are more effective than taking something orally. From malabsorption issues to the digestive breakdown of a supplement and the enzymatic processes involved, sometimes “wearing” your medicine, or “bathing” various body parts with it might be your best option!

Ancient wounds tethered to false prophets

Promises ignited from fear and loss

Bonds forged from both power and powerlessness

Centuries of stories created to bind human against human.

Where has this gotten us?

A light barely recognized in the absence of love.

Tears from generations past

Weeping profusely from your eyes

And streaming down your cheeks.

A faith always challenged

A stranger to your own pain.

We are at times unknown to each other.

Our weaknesses can accomplish much with love.

You are part of the same ripple in the universe

As your brethren.

Masculine or feminine

In truth doesn’t matter.

To touch your scars softly

With my heart allows me to embrace my own pain.

Oh God what you find in the emptiness

Changes with every moment of growth.

The abyss can be resplendent

With intimacy

If you only allow it to be seen

If you only allow yourself to be witnessed.

I bear witness to you my friends.

To your hopes and dreams that walk this earth

Filled with so much possibility.

I bear witness to your prayers.

To the form they birth in alignment with God’s will.

We are the inner home of God’s breath.

My breath is with you as yours is with me.

This home we have built needs each and every one of us.

Unburden yourself sweet children of God

And love one another.

Yes.

Just love one another!