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The New Reality

As we awaken from isolation, there is a parting of the mind and heart from thoughts and patterns that we thought once made us whole.

We functioned in relationship in ways which we identified since early childhood.
The pandemic changed all that.
It ignited a sense of fragmentation that many of us had not experienced since coming out of the womb.
Reintegrating after a personal and collective trauma has its challenges.
Relationships are struggling through major shifts as we awaken.
Many do not recognize the glue that held those relationships intact, searching for remnants of who they were in that relationship and how to now identify the other.
Our containers for understanding the meaning of relationship have cracked, and we are being compelled to create new definitions.
This is leading to power struggles – some so intense that they are surprising people sharing their stories with me.
Who is this person they have shared their life with for so long?
Who have they themselves become?
We are being asked to create a new vessel.
A new vessel of understanding, compassion, and communication.
We do not have to figure all of this out now.
Most of us are actually trying to rush the process, trying to integrate the new realities so that life can get back to “normal”.
How can we when we are just entering this new world and relearning emotional and psychological patterns of being?
Bearing witness to self is a gentle and slow process. Bearing witness to another in relationship is even more complex and requires patience.
We are all functioning at different levels and our nervous systems are still adjusting and becoming reacquainted with survival mechanisms.
The person we are in relationship with is in the same space we are; integrating and awakening without yet recognizing all the tools at their disposal.
Fear and anger is triggered as we scramble to create an identity which makes us feel safe again.
The isolation challenged that notion of inner safety.
Power struggles with yourself and with those closest to us will not make us feel any safer nor help us find ourselves again.
Your inner safety will reveal itself in time.
Once it does, you will be offered new tools to be in relationship.
I just ask you to open your hearts and your minds to be more patient with yourself and those you love than you have ever been before.

The Transgenerational Pattern Shifter

 

You know who you are.
Your blood, sweat and tears felt across parallel universes.
Generations past hear your voice,
They feel your pain, revel in your glory.
You tread slowly in darkness,
Yearning to be drenched in understanding.
For your plight goes unnoticed at times by both friend and foe.
Your wound divides you between realities.
The unknown takes hold of you.
With every breath you take,
You struggle to know yourself, to know the path.
What is hidden can only be revealed in stillness.
And what is revealed will heal you and those tears of your ancestors.
Rise gently dear soul.
Your inner work bound by holiness.
An untethered spirit carried in the womb of the Divine.
Chosen for this important mission.
Your rewards will be many.
You, yes you.

Emerge

The warmth of the sun kissing your lips. The songs of birds echoing in your ears.
Change is coming.
Emerging from darkness, the isolation had its purpose.
Defined by the healing crisis we have all struggled through.
The isolation became a companion as the world returned to its original wound of separation.
Drenched in sorrow, the unknown had its place among us. It needed us as much as we needed it.
We needed it in the light, only we bathed with it in the darkness.
Our fury contained within boundaries we had not yet uncovered.
Our faith in the light wavering from desperation.
How are we to trust the new horizon?

Emerge slowly.
So that you may taste the light in all its innocence and remember the darkness.
Not as you would have it, but as that wound of separation.
That wound which brought many of you back to yourself.
Back to this world, back to each other.

The warmth of the sun is kissing your lips today.
The birds will sing glorious melodies in your name.
Emerge children of God, for in your suffering,
all was made holy and still.

The New Normal

 

Fear and anxiety have taken on new meaning and identities for many of us during this world wide pandemic.
The psychological constructs set in place from the moment we were in utero through normal stages of development could have never prepared most of us in this country for what has transpired and will continue to do so. My work with clients has taken new form, looking at epigenetics more closely and the integration of trauma from a person’s lineage. This has always been core to my work over these years, but in working with the trauma response needed for today’s challenges, we might be needing different tools.
Individually and collectively, our response to trauma in deeply rooted within our DNA. The resources many of us think we do not have to cope with these challenges may actually be awaiting us in the deepest recesses of our spirit, the spirits of our grandparents, our great grandparents, and so on.
We are finely tuned to the safety mechanisms we have created as a result of our life experiences, many times unaware of the strengths of our ancestors in dealing with the trauma they dealt with. And when they could not resolve their fears and anxieties, those miasms would pass down to the next generation along with opportunities for healing and integration.
Trauma and our response to it lives in parallel realities. Each positive step we take as well as those who came before us shifts our DNA and lives inside each of us to be used as a resource when needed, but the problem is many of us aren’t even aware we have these ‘superpowers’ of awareness at our disposal.
I usually take a client back to a past familial trauma, one that they could either remember, or perhaps one I am seeing beyond the veil. We look at the response, both positively and negatively. I look at how their bodies and minds are reacting as they tell the story. We look at the impact of the story. Then we take some time and unwind the story so that the healing response in their DNA has some space for the new awareness that was already encoded to come forth.
If the ways in which you are dealing with fear and anxiety aren’t working for you at this moment, reach back in time.
You’ve got nothing to lose except a triggered response to a story which has kept you suffering

Universe

She was grace embodied.

That raw wildness taking hold of her spirit.

Consuming her flesh until her communion with the Divine

was absolute.
Craving solitude,
She crawled into herself,
into her womb,
into the portal of infinity.
Beyond any realm she had ever known.
Transforming into energy unrealized before,
She came to know herself as both god and goddess.
Softly, she entered into stillness.
And that is when she realized the universe lay waiting at her feet.

Rise

Rise from the darkness dear children

One womb at a time will gently unfold into another
Leaving footprints of grace only to be blessed by the gods
As you transform into the immaculate
Conceived through incarnations
God calls you by your name
Each and every one of you
Reaching into the very corners of your heart
Your are tenderly held
The darkness will not leave you
It is held softly within the light
As it flows through every chamber in heaven
Only to leave you with such compassion for all that was lost.
Rise gracefully
For what is to come will only be a semblance of the glory intended for your soul.

Solstice

 

Gather the bones of your ancestors my friends. Gently whisper into their ears.
The time has come to be released from their form.
Even in the world of spirit, some still struggle with the darkness. Others still fear the light.
Accompanied by the Divine, you will become master of your own heart as this portal emerges upon us.
A solstice so inviting, the sun and moon weep tears of ecstasy,
The stars surrender to a rhythm only love can create.
We are in a brief moment in time where we can dwell in the house of the gods.
All of us.
Both saint and sinner, equally held by tender mercies of a great compassion we have yet to behold.
It is here the unknown will be known to us.
Where God’s magnificent handiwork upon creation
Will be afforded the indispensable opportunity to forgive one another.
To release each other from the very darkness that brought us to this place.
To release our ancestors from their own fears.
Yes, a brief moment in linear time is upon us my fellow travelers.
We beseech you Solstice, have mercy on us and give us the strength to enter into love unconditionally.

A Heartbeat Away

The pounding rain is echoing outside my window, pulsing in resonance with the majestic womb of this earth we call home.

I know she is readying herself, readying us, to enter into this new world of both light and abyss.
2020 was only the beginning of this monumental transition, this paradigm shift towards a selfless humanity.
Yes, I said selfless.
I noticed this week after that full moon, people were scattered. Major life events were triggered with almost every client I spoke with.
The “need to know” was so heightened and coupled with an extreme anxiety about the future.
What I kept hearing underneath the chatter was the need to know how long the suffering and struggle would continue.
How long identities would stay intact.
How long the emptiness would last.
That need to know perpetuating more suffering and struggle.
The nakedness of reality so daunting that we compartmentalize only to survive, leaving little room for acceptance of what surrounds us at present.
That need to know protecting us from communion with one another, communion with suffering as part of life’s path.
Suffering and struggle as a gateway to selflessness if we only took a moment to breathe through it.
You experience the emptiness as a hollow vessel of uncertainty.
I say it is filled with possibility, making us less susceptible to illusion, more susceptible to love.
Our footprints upon this majestic womb are changing.
Our footprints beyond this world already have.
We haven’t noticed them yet as the opportunity to stay in the present has been so painful for many.
I am here with you.
You are here with me.
A heartbeat away from acceptance.
I will hold your hand until we arrive together.

Dear 2020

Dear 2020,
Your sojourn amidst linear reality has left us altered.
What was once recognizable, experienced through a comfortable state of perceived reality, has opened gateways into unchartered territory of our emotional landscaping.
There is a perfection to chaos which not even you can undermine.
This place we call home, this kingdom we have yet to encounter is everlasting.
2020 is but a moment in this vast experience of rebirth, a glimpse into a communal soul that awaits each one of us as we walk this path.
We have learned much from you; a grace only to be mirrored by those angels in heaven.
You have taught us to adapt, to struggle well, to surrender more, to pray incessantly.
The commonality of loss, grief, fear, shame; the plethora of emotions we still have yet to dance with, has indeed made life’s melody more interesting.

You thought you would separate us but you didn’t.
In fact, I want to ask you to accompany us, not as the year of darkness, but as the year of hope.
A year even perhaps of triumph, one that has given us all an understanding of mercy we never held before.
Mercy toward ourselves and one another.
Amen.

Remembrance

The moment I touched the earth,

Flesh upon flesh,
Innocence upon innocence,
She called to me from her womb.
Seeing my pain,
The rawness of my unworthiness,
She enveloped me one breath at a time.
Until I could no longer feel myself, a reflection of my woundedness.
Until I could feel her.
Just her.
Stroking my hair, caressing my body,
Soothing me until I no longer felt alone,
Belonging to a part of that womb which has nourished me since I entered this realm.
The Goddess embodied in a place that could sometimes be unholy,
Taking my breath and making it her own.
Reminding me that holiness can be found everywhere I lay my feet upon the ground, upon her.
Earth to earth.
Child to womb.
Soul to soul.
I love you.